Who Are You Now?
Reinventing Yourself and Loving It
How to Move Forward with Grace
Someone innocently asked what I do. Harumph. Such a simple question, and it throws me into turmoil. What DO I do? Who AM I at this point in my life? To define myself as a mom when my kids are grown and gone doesn’t feel right. And I’m divorcing, so wife isn't right. I write blog, but blogger sounds awkward. How do I define myself at this new stage?
Transitions can be awkward… from mom, career woman, or wife to empty nester, retired, divorced, or widowed.
The Big Question: Who Am I Now?
For decades, you’ve worn many titles—mom, wife, professional, caretaker. But now, with menopause behind you and a new chapter ahead, a big question emerges: Who are you now?
You are at a new milestone which brings an emotional and identity shift. With children grown, careers evolving, and relationships changing, you may find yourself feeling both liberated and uncertain. The truth is, this phase of life isn’t about fading into the background—it’s about stepping into your full power and embracing who you’ve always been.
The Myth of ‘Over the Hill’—Reclaiming This Time for YOU
Society often implies that as women get older, particularly after menopause, they become less relevant. This was a general theme from the Jane Fonda/Lily Tomlin series, Grace and Frankie. It the show they revealed over and over how women are discounted as they age.
It’s time to flip the script!
Some of the most incredible reinventions happen in this stage of life:
Vera Wang didn’t design her first wedding dress until she was 40.
Julia Child didn’t publish her first cookbook until she was 50.
Viola Davis, Oprah Winfrey, and countless other women have spoken about their true self-discovery happening later in life.
This is a time of expansion, confidence, and deep self-awareness. The key? Taking control of your own narrative and deciding what this next phase looks like for YOU.
Redefining Your Identity on Your Terms
After years of prioritizing others, it’s time to tune in to what truly matters to you now. Start by asking yourself:
What are your values? What drives you today may be different than what shaped you in my 30s and 40s.
What lights you up? What have you put on hold while caring for family, building a career, or handling life’s responsibilities?
What dreams do you still want to pursue? Whether it’s traveling, starting a business, writing a book, or simply slowing down and savoring life, now is the time to say YES to yourself.
Reconnecting with Your Body & Mind
Your body has carried you through decades of life. Now, it deserves to be celebrated and cared for—not criticized. Instead of chasing outdated fitness and beauty standards, shift your focus to strength, energy, and joy:
Movement as self-care: Many of my friends enjoy barre classes. The Bar Method is opening in San Francisco again downtown at the end of June. Stay tuned for more details.
Water aerobics, yoga, walking, and strength training are all fantastic ways to stay strong and vibrant without punishing workouts.
Mindset matters: Meditation, journaling, and therapy can help you navigate this transition with clarity and confidence. It’s about taking the time to dive into yourself to uncover your thoughts and feelings that may have been hidden for ages.
Style & self-image: Wear what makes you feel radiant, try a bold new lipstick, or embrace your silver hair with pride. Confidence is the most attractive quality at any age!
Reinvention Isn’t Reinvention—It’s a Homecoming
Instead of seeing this as “starting over,” consider it a return to your true self. Think back to:
The passions and interests you had before life got busy.
The dreams you postponed but never truly let go of.
The parts of yourself that felt suppressed or ignored.
Now is the time to bring those things forward again, with the wisdom and confidence that only experience can bring.
Loving This Chapter with Open Arms
Reinvention doesn’t have to mean drastic change. It can be as simple as:
Saying yes to new opportunities instead of automatically declining them.
Surrounding yourself with like-minded women who inspire and uplift you.
Setting small but exciting goals that bring a sense of adventure and possibility into your life.
Your Next Steps: A Reinvention Roadmap
Journal Prompts:
Who do I want to be in this next chapter of my life?
What have I been afraid to claim for myself?
What brings me the most joy, and how can I bring more of it into my life?
Action Item: Try something new this week—big or small. Take a dance class, wear a bold outfit, strike up a conversation with someone interesting, or say yes to an unexpected invitation.
Mantra: I am becoming, and the best is yet to come.
This is your time. Step into it boldly, and love every second of the journey.
Tarot Card for this week:
Seven of Swords
This card encourages you to act strategically. It’s about letting go of something old so you can move on to something new. It is definitely about taking action.
So go to work! Have a great week!